19 Words That Will Make People Like You More

[W!nston]

Words are tools. Knowing how and when to use words is a skill. I thought I would share this from Inc dot com​

19 Words That Will Make People Like You More

Want to make a better first impression and engender positive feelings that last a long time? Focus on what you say as much as what you do.

First impressions can lead to lasting impressions. So to improve, a lot of people will tell you to dress better, read more (so you'll have interesting things to talk about), and ensure that your online presence is respectable (because many people will check you out online before meeting in person).

But, how far will that get you? Despite what many people would like to believe, the things you say often make an even greater early impression than the things you do. To take advantage of that and get you started easily, here are 19 words--grouped into a handful of easy phrases--that you should make a habit of saying every day. They're virtually guaranteed to improve your standing with others if you use them often enough.
Words No. 1 and 2: "Sir" and "ma'am"

American culture is pretty informal compared to many other places in the world, but a little bit of formality can really make you stand out in a positive way. I carry this inclination from the military, and also from having been a lawyer in the federal court system. These are environments in which people use the titles "Sir" and "Ma'am" constantly--not just in talking with high ranking military officers, but also addressing civilians.

I know that this doesn't work in every situation, but using these titles can be a sign of respect that gets people's attention. It can be important in professional relationships, especially when dealing with people you don't know well, and who are older or more experienced than you.
Words No. 3 and 4: "You're welcome."

Sometime in fairly recent history it seems people stopped saying, "You're welcome," and started substituting, "Yep," or, "No problem." At the risk of sounding older than I am, I think this is a step in the wrong direction--at least in a business or professional setting.

Why? Because ditching "you're welcome" for these other phrases changes the message. "You're welcome" acknowledges that you've done something worth someone else's thanks, while "no problem" suggests that it wasn't that big of a deal. Saying the former phrase conveys that you think it was a worthwhile favor. That's an impressive message to send.
Words No. 5 to 7: "Here's what's happening."

If you've ever worked in an environment in which people guarded information like a valuable commodity, you'll appreciate how much affinity you develop for the few people who try to keep everyone else accurately informed.

Of course you don't want to be a know-it-all or spread rumors. However, even if you don't know the full story, being willing to share the information you have that affects others' lives can make you instantly more likable.
Words No. 8 to 11: "How can I help?"

Nobody accomplishes anything amazing alone. Thus, with the exception of the sociopaths among us, we're all eventually grateful to those who help us achieve great things. I think we're especially grateful to those who proactively try to help.

This doesn't mean you have to go way out of your way to offer assistance, but it's often the case that you have access to something or the ability to do something that won't take much on your part, but that can really have a positive impact on someone else's success.
Words #12 to 15: "I'll find out."

This is one of my favorite phrases. It's related to "how can I help," but is even more proactive. It says that you're not only willing to offer assistance, but that you're willing to go out of your way to do so.

(By the way, this helpful phrase is also the diametric opposite of the most bureaucratic phrase known to humankind, uttered incessantly by some of the least likable people: "That's not my job.")
Words No. 16 to 19: "I believe in you."

Henry Ford recalled that when he was still an unknown, and was working on gasoline engines, a few short words of encouragement from an already famous Thomas Edison were a massive shot in the arm.

It's amazing how just a little bit of validation from other people can inspire people to work harder and achieve more. Four short words can have a huge, positive impact--both for the people you're encouraging, and for their feelings toward you .​

 

[tonka]

I work in the in between area of my building.
In one direction are the company execs; in the other direction are the warehouse guys.
I'm in the equipment service area right in the middle.

I come and go via the back door. I say hi to everyone and call them sir. The warehouse turnover is pretty high. If they last, my buddy Ben put's a name to the face.
It works.

When the sales people come in, I say what is NOT on the list. "See the manager. Unless he assigns he this, I cannot help you."

 

[norvehc]

This might work in America but it's hopelessly wrong for Australia. We hate being called 'Sir or Ma'am' and generally will ask that it not be used. 'How can I help' is often used by sales people, which translates to 'what can I sell you' so everyone else avoids using that phrase, and 'you're welcome' is the standard reply to 'Thank you' and doesn't really mean anything. It's just a polite meaningless acknowledgement.
Our cultures are quite different it would seem .. .. ..

 

[Shelter]

No Norvehc it wouldn't SEEM - it IS!

In every culture or in every country of this world there are forms of courtesy which in another culture or country are unknown. The address "Sir" or Ma'am" for instance may be common and polite in the english spoken language area - perhaps mostly in the USA. In Germany for instance you will approach to a superior as "Herr Schneider" or "Frau Schneider" (Mr. or Mrs Schneider) It is a form of politeness to mention the name of your vis-a-vis! And Norvehc you are too right with "How I can help" - in German perhaps translated as "Womit kann ich dienen?". These phrase will be applied by sales people here as well. And well it is a phrase only.

But nonetheless it is always very important to be politely to every people may it be your boss, your friend, or a stranger who is asking you something. And courtesy is expressing not only in words but too and above all in a friendly and open pointing to your vis-a-vis.

 

[mikey11]

I suppose as a universal rule of thumb, respect and humility will get you places.

 

[Dendood]

I am still amazed by the world of hurt that will descend on you in France if one forgets to say, "Bonjour."

 

[Dendood]

And I can't help but add my favorite word in the English language is hearing, 'Yes.'

Can I suck your cock?
Can I eat your ass?

-Works on me like a charm.

 

[Shelter]

And I can't help but add my favorite word in the English language is hearing, 'Yes.'

Can I suck your cock?
Can I eat your ass?

-Works on me like a charm.

Jester!!!! :big hug: p :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

 

[dargelos]

A prescriptive list of how to talk works with some people, it dosen't work on me. When an employee is under orders to talk in the company approved style it comes over as convincing as Donald Trump's hairstyle. You can fool some of the people some of the time but I prefer clumsy rude sincerity to slick fake politeness.
As Sting sang of Quentin Crisp "be yourself, no matter what they say"

 

[Shelter]

I prefer clumsy rude sincerity to slick fake politeness.
As Sting sang of Quentin Crisp "be yourself, no matter what they say"

That is good and certainly honest, but while you are in occupation you have to know the ropes. And there it is not always very clever to be too honest and direct. So from time to time you have to act like a player! If you do so you still will have your job tomorrow - if not .................... but you have been yourself, no matter what they say!

 

[Urban]

I live in the US, & most of the suggestions work well here, but remember that the list was apparently composed for a business setting. Some of the phrases would work in ordinary social situations, some not so much.

"Sir" and "Ma'am" would mainly work only if the person you are addressing is obviously older than you, and only if you don't know them personally. I can tell you I almost had my head stomped on for calling a young waitress "Ma'am" once, and I've never done it again!

 

[dargelos]

In many parts of the world a "Madam" is the owner of a brothel, perhaps that's why she didn't like the word.

 

[Urban]

In many parts of the world a "Madam" is the owner of a brothel, perhaps that's why she didn't like the word.

Good point, but in my case she was very clear that it was an age-related issue. Younger women (in the US, anyway) don't want to be called by terms that are more appropriate for older ones.

I already knew that; it was kind of a mistake, but one I'm now keenly aware of.

 

[tsimonj]

I am still amazed by the world of hurt that will descend on you in France if one forgets to say, "Bonjour."

Not just 'Bonjour' but 'Bonjour Monsieur' or 'Bonjour Madame'. Anything else is considered very uncouth!

 

[dargelos]

Not just 'Bonjour' but 'Bonjour Monsieur' or 'Bonjour Madame'. Anything else is considered very uncouth!

Then we English speakers go on to keep mixing up tu and vous so they think we really are hopeless at languages.

 

[Shelter]

Then we English speakers go on to keep mixing up tu and vous so they think we really are hopeless at languages.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: Great - but good!