Labels

[Hyp]

LABELS

Do labels like "twink" - "bear" - "daddy" - or other terms to categorize guys into body types bother you? It's an easy way to describe a guy, but not everyone likes labels.

Comments?

 

[gb2000ie]

Honestly, it doesn't bother me.

I don't worry at all about what category people put me into. I don't spend any engergy at all worry about whether or not I am being a 'proper bear'. I'm short, chubby, and as hairy as a carpet, so I'm pretty sure I've been described as a bear by someone.

What worries me muh more is what other words they include:

"do you rember GB200? That very sweet Belgian-Irish bear"

-v-

"do you remember that GB2000 dickhead? You know, that arrogant Belgian-Irish bear?"

Avoiding terms like 'bear' seems as silly as avoiding mentioning skin colour when describing someone's physical appearance. I'll never forget seeing a BBC presenter trying to avoid the blindingly obvious when calling on a black man in the audience in a discussion show with audience participation - "the man in the back, in the blue jumper, the tall one" - he was the only black man in that whole region of the audience - what would have been so wrong with saying "the black man in the blue jumper"?

Bottom line - as long as no one confuses physical appearance with opinions, values, or worth, I really don't care if you call me a bear, or a black man a black man. Avoiding these words has nothing to do with equality.

B.

 

[haiducii]

I like the labels. Anything that makes navigation easier is always a plus.

 

[Shelter]

Honestly, it doesn't bother me.

- as long as no one confuses physical appearance with opinions, values, or worth, I really don't care if you call me a bear, or a black man a black man. Avoiding these words has nothing to do with equality.

B.

Thank you GB - very, very good written. Policital correctness very often has odd ideas!

You know a chocolate covered marshmallow? The age old German term for it is NEGERKUSS (Negro-kiss). But that is now officially banned. You have to say now SCHOKOKUSS (Chocolate-kiss) or SCHAUMKUSS (Foam-kiss). The newest nonsense is the ZIGEUNERSCHNITZEL (Gypsy-escalope). Because the term ZIGEUNER (Gipsy) is a banned one we shall call it now BALKANSCHNITZEL!

Yes you can laugh - but sometimes I want to cry about such an enacted insanity!

 

[anarren]

They bother me mostly because I've always fallen in the middle - I'm not skinny but not fat or muscley, in my 30s now so not so young or very old, I have 'gay voice' but otherwise act "like a boy" most of the time (beer, explosives, fishing, etc.).

But also at this point it's just another lazy way of dismissing people - 'ugh those twinks' etc.

 

[W!nston]

Labels are a necessary evil when 'shopping' for Porn. They are unavoidable adjectives in real life too.

In the context of Gay Porn terms like twink, bear, daddy are sometimes useful but not always truthful. There's a lot of false advertising if you know what I mean.

In real life labels are verbal shorthand. If I want to tell you about a young man you don't know I might use 'twink' in our conversation. You would picture an attractive man in his early twenties would you not? If I tell you he is a bear you would picture someone with hairy chest etc or cub would tell you he is young and hairy or small stature and hairy (one of my favs, lol). If I said Daddy you would know he wasn't a twink. Am I right so far?

There are much worse stereotypes that might sound offensive but are still used in conversation as shortcut descriptions and I don't object to the majority of them.

I wouldn't mind if you or others refer to me as a Daddy because I know that is a good descriptor for my appearance. I'd like it even more if you said Hot Daddy

 

[gb2000ie]

Thank you GB - very, very good written. Policital correctness very often has odd ideas!

You know a chocolate covered marshmallow? The age old German term for it is NEGERKUSS (Negro-kiss). But that is now officially banned. You have to say now SCHOKOKUSS (Chocolate-kiss) or SCHAUMKUSS (Foam-kiss). The newest nonsense is the ZIGEUNERSCHNITZEL (Gypsy-escalope). Because the term ZIGEUNER (Gipsy) is a banned one we shall call it now BALKANSCHNITZEL!

Yes you can laugh - but sometimes I want to cry about such an enacted insanity!

I'm not sure the examples you picked are particuarlly good ones. Racial slurs are not the same thing as honest descriptions!

Black is a colour that exists in the world. It can be used to describe things. Negro did not start life as a racial slur, but thanks to centuries of attrocities, it has become one. I don't see a problem with moving away from names that contain racial slurs.

The meanings of words shift over time. Something which was innocent a century ago is not necessarily still OK today.

Given the word's baggage, I'm OK with re-naming a NegroKiss to a ChocolateKiss - the latter is just as descriptive, and free from racial slurs.

I have a much bigger problem with basic descriptie words becoming taboo. Black is nota slur, it is a VERY common colour, and a VERY common word!

There was a time a decade or so ago when there was a genuine push to stop usinh the words "blackboard" and "whiteboard". That's the kind of thing I have a big problem with.

Now - if someone started to call them niggerboards and crackerboards, then, frankly, I'd be all in favour of telling that person to stop being a prick!

Not all labels are the same - some have centuries of baggage!

B.

 

[brmstn69]

Would you prefer "hirsute endomorph" instead of bear?

 

[Hyp]

yeah, I was trying to avoid racial descriptors here and focus on the common ways we tend to categorize someone's physical appearance. As an example, if you're a slim-built young gay man do you get annoyed if people call you a twink?

Being objectified by others can be dehumanizing, but so much about sex and attraction is about objectification. There's the old phrase, "the object of my affection." Meaning I love this thing - this thing, not this person.

But then again, sexual objectification is a two-way street. When we're out on the prowl looking for a hot guy I'm doing as much categorizing and judging of their physical appearance as they are doing to me. I've never heard a buddy say, "that guy's ugly and not my type, but I really want to know what he thinks about the state of the education system and the reliability of the electrical grid." No, my buddy probably says, "oh, there's a hot daddy, I bet he's hung like a horse." And off he goes to make his conquest...

 

[gb2000ie]

Would you prefer "hirsute endomorph" instead of bear?

No, no I would not

B.