Stereotypical view of gay people

[expressboy]

There are different kind of people. Two straight persons aren't the same, just like two gay persons.


But why do people always think gay boys are acting like women? They think gay people talk like girls, walk like girls, like female clothes, like to wear female clothes...

Even media and tv series do that. In some tv series there is always an effeminate gay character, it is never a normal man who likes men.


I hate when people say gay man is a woman in male body, that is a bunch of crap.


Gay boy is a person who like men, and that is it.


I have nothing against effeminate gay boys, but I am not attracted to them? Why? Well, I like men, not women, so a man who acts like a woman isn't attractive to me. But I respect them.

 

[Blacky94]

First of all effeminate men stand more out than gay guys who look like the average straight male. Nobody looks at a "normal looking" guy and thinks "He is definetly gay!"

However, I think these pride parades are also at fault. The first thing you notice on this parades are skinny men dressed in revealing, colorful, sometimes non-existent clothing that you would normally only see on women.
here and there are also men who look like they came straight out a hardcore sex club. Of course there are normally dressed people as well
(straight and gay).And while that is not necessarily bad, what sticks inside one's mind when they see it are the many effeminate men in colorful clothing.
And these events are public and are sometimes on TV, and many people who don't know gay people themselves assume that gay people tend to be more effeminate than "normal" guys.
But honestly it is just a stereotype like: "Germans only eat sauerkraut and beer", "Americans are fat" "black people all have big dicks" (I am black and my dick is just average <.<)
I don't really think it is that much of a problem.

 

[Rozas]

I understand perfectly what you want to try to explain expressboy....

 

[Sinnerr]

It's because they don't know any noncloseted gay in their enviroment. These who know some don't think that.

 

[gb2000ie]

I wish it were the case that only straight people stereotyped gay people - but since even gays do it to each other, how can we reasonably expect better from straights?

B.

 

[whatthef__k]

Just think about how long it took (and of course still takes) women to be treated as equal to men in most cultural circles...

Stereotypes are easy and helpful in some cases, and difficult and unhelpful in other cases. But we all have them.

 

[jw4833]

I'm in total agreement of this post. I've had straight acquaintances whom had watched and analyzed me all the time when I was in their presence because I did not personify their stereotypes of a gay man's behavior. I remember this one female that I knew would always call her brother a "fag or gay" in my presence and then she would immediately apologize to me for saying those words. I responded by saying, first of all, why keep saying words that you may feel would offend in my presence and then that you are compensating with a weak apology afterwards unless you really meant to speak them? Secondly, I don't categorize myself as being a "fag"..I am a gay man who is more man than you would ever experience with a straight man. Just because I have the same attraction that you have for a man does not make me less of a man at all.

However, this discussion does not stop with ignorant straight people with their stereotypes of what a gay man personify. I've also had this problem with the gay community as well. For years, in the gay community in my city, because I did not act the way that was described in the initial post, I was speculated as being a gay basher or down low. I was also alienated by a lot of guys because I chose to dress clean and conservative when I was in the club environment. My way of dressing labeled me as being conceited and arrogant.

What was so strange was that before many of the guys began to approach me, it was lesbian women and bartenders who gravitated towards me initially because they liked the way I carry myself and because they went out of their way to create a bond with me, they say the humorous and caring side of me that others did not take the time to see. Lesbian women became the segue for guys to approach me without labeling or stereotyping me prior to getting to know me.

What I found humorous was that all the male strippers that performed at the clubs immediately approached me and became my buddies because I did not look at them specifically as a piece of meat, but I took time to hear about their goals and interests and why they chose to strip. Due to my friendship with male strippers, I was then labeled as the "the down low guy who fucks strippers"...lol...(well...honestly...I did have my share and a few are still my close friends to date...but that was not my initial intent..lol).

In closing, what I'm trying to say is bad enough that straight people do assume that gay people carry themselves in a certain manner, however and unfortunately, there are gay people who do the same to each other.

 

[prinz4ming]

I can see where you are coming from (no pun intended ) but as was pointed out before, its probably because no one notices the 'straight acting' gays and therefore only the flamboyant men stand out.

And where do stereotypes arise from? Lack of familiarity, fear of the unknown and ignorance leading to preconceived notions and false ideas. The only way to combat that is to increase visibility and for actors, sportspeople, politicians and public figures to come out and show that being gay/lesbian isn't the only aspect of their personality. I know its asking for a lot, but I have hope

 

[Demetrius]

Sometime stereotype uprise from common or personal experiences.

 

[777]

Gender expression is pretty interesting concept. Something about making homosexual masculinity to look effeminate compared to heterosexual masculinity confirms the gender norms and promotes heterosexual masculinity as the "right" way to perform masculinity in our culture, in which context talking about femme boys as problematic is problematic itself.

Anyway, I think people have the right to dress and behave how ever they want and the femme guys I know do it to irritate, to take themselves apart from the norm, to show other guys they are into guys, to say "fuck you" to the people who say they shouldn't look like that, and also, because it's fun. It doesn't make them any less manly, just different kind of manly

 

[c750dt]

I love stereotypes; they're just a means for easy humor. We can be offended by something or laugh at it. With that said, I fall into a number of stereotypes and defy a good number more.

 

[zaviour]

I fall into a number of stereotypes and defy a good number more.

Exactly

 

[Otage]

I hate the fact that everything is always has to be putted in to these tight small "boxes" so everyone can neatly read the labble and see immediatly what's that guy about. Handy in keeping household items in control though:thinking: Some can be very good at guessing what people are like, but the more and more you know them, the more unique invidual they become, no matter how dull the "case".

 

[SimplyJakeAndAlex]

I'm a living stereotype. I'm blonde so I must be stupid, I'm pretty so I must be easy, I'm tall so I must prefer tall people, and gay (even if I wasn't - fortunately I am) - so I must be a blond, tall bottom, shallow, bitch who loves only other tall blond shallow dudes.

Well here's the truth;
I'm blond - Yes that's true, but I'm not stupid I've graduated with honors as a medical nurse and I excel in math and chemistry.
I'm pretty - well my husband keeps on saying that but I find myself pretty normal and I'm not that easy.
I'm tall - 6 feet and some dust and my husband is actually smaller than I am with his 5'7''.
I am a blond versatile bottom, tall and my husband is a beautiful mix of black west indian and central american latino, I needed someone that was not my clone and yet super hot . I must be one heck of a statistic

And my avatar shows his amazing ass in underwear

Babe I would have never marry you if you were stupid... and no you're not a "normal beauty" honey you cause accidents when you walk down the street... guess why )

 

[Cerno]

Because feminine gays are more extrovert. They r not afraid to show themselves. "Look at me, I'm fabulous!" Manly gays? They are TOO DISCREET! How many gay men who are afraid their IDs are out? So of course, str8 people think, gay = feminine men

 

[sunandmoon]

First off - it amazes me and I love the fact that gay community (for whatever) reason spawned so many diverse subcultures: effeminate gays, leather gays, bears and drag queens, etc etc while I guess the majority are people who do not fall under any of those stereotypes. While I do have my personal preferences - I like men more on a masculine rugged side - it does not prevent me from admiring the giggling flock of femme boys or the glamor of a drag queen.
So I guess we inside the gay community should acknowledge and celebrate this diversity more instead of trying to slight some of them and fit into some "normal" stereotype.

However, I like some of stereotypes attached to gays. E.g. gays have better taste and style, they are more empathic, their median income is higher, and the art through centuries and now would hardly be what it is - we have contributed disproportionally to things humanity admires.