Your Older Sibling Ever Call You This?

[OLMPKY]

Hi all, Do some of you have older siblings that call you faggot just to make you mad when they are upset with you? My brother(oldest) starts back calling me that last night. And yeah, I totally got made at em for it. And honestly, I want to stay like that toward him until he changes his attitude towards me. And i think thats really f'd up how he'd just call me that again. When he started calling me that, we were YOUNGER lol. So imature of him. And honestly, When i get called that by people, i start to feel like i wanna turn away from god.

 

[Otage]

Well, not ever since I came out to him. He can sometimes call me that in teasing kinda joke way though, which just shows that it's not some oddity, to which he has to pretend doesn't exist.

But I remember when in shcool, it was the worst thing you could call someone. But if someone calls me faggot knowing that I'm one, I don't really get that uppset. Their hate really tells more about them, and calling me faggot, well doesn't really tell anything about me. He just states, that "you are homosexual, and I have somekinda wierd broblem with that. Maybe I myself are in closet, or hate the fact that somebody has the courage to be brave and truly be themselves, embrace fruits of the life. Or maybe everything different than me frightens me, cause I don't have the capacity to understand differences. Everything is black and white in my mind, cause everyone says that, and I can't think things for myself" Yeah, come and shout that outloud. Always makes me try not to grinn wide open

 

[Otage]

And ofc brothers fight, at least when young. I have smashed my older brother in the head with a heavy clay flower vaseX_X You have to tell him how offensive you find him calling you that, and explain to him why you personally feel it to be so hurtfull. Make clear he crosses the line. After all the fighting, brothers should always be there for you, backing you up. At least that I try to do always when bossible with my brother, and sometimes he even returns the favour, even though we aren't that close anymore

 

[jw4833]

Yes...to this day...although they don't say it much in my presence but it is said a lot (faggot) about me behind my back to other siblings. However, when it was revealed that I was gay...they all would say that word to me a lot and many times they would start arguments with me in order to give them some kind of validation to use it.

 

[Otage]

Well, in that case, that if they truly don't like you because you are gay, and only try to insult and hurt you, then I would cut them off. Loosing the useless heavy baggage - no matter how blood related or how accustomed to them you may have grown - might be the way to go. Don't know the full situation here, so this is just some thing for your own consideration, some thing to which to mirror your own bonderings.

And I don't know how long have they known that you are gay, cause some times people need time to realize that the person who has come out, is still that same person. Don't do anything hasty, don't make decisions this big when angry.

I have had to cut off few relatives for other reasons, but they wanted only bad things for me and detested me. I have never regretted the desicion I made, and had almost forgotten them all together. Nobody needs people like them in their lives, and I let people like that know that:butslap: When I end things, I want it all to be clear to everyone why it has happened, so nothing leaves open, to linger in ones thoughts. After the fact that I know, that they know, it really doesn't matter anymore what they think.

 

[OLMPKY]

He actually does say it to hurt me. And... He achieves that. But see, he's gonna start calling me that cause I keep bothering him. And I admit I do bother him cause he's the only person I can talk to. But he hates that a lot. He says I talk too much lol. And sometimes I think I do. So, he's gonna start calling me that f word just so I could leave Em alone. And, he may just get that. Probably forever! Who knows!! Ya know? And this is all a shame cause we are getting older and older. And he still calls me this word. I don't even call Em fat. I don't know why but I just stopped. Only time I call Em fat is when I'm playing around. And he knows when I'm playin. He's crazy. I think he has anger issues. I mean, doesn't studies show that fat can cause more stress or anger problems!? Correct? I read that once before online somewhere.

 

[Otage]

Well don't know if it's just brothers going to extreme lengths to fight with eachothers. I would say sleep on it, take distance, cool down, think and then decide what to do. And I don't think being overweight gives person right to be mean. If he has anger issues, he needs help, but that doesn't mean that people should just cladly be his mental punching bag.

 

[Frenchgerman]

go back to the original meaning of "faggot" and ask why he wants to burn you ... Perhaps he will start thinking than ...

 

[lhardwick69]

its funny I don't get that from brothers but guys at work call me a homo and a faggot all the time I just call them a heterosexual--
reason being is the more they see it bothers you the more he will do it-- so don't let him see it bother you he wil let it go--or have a talk with him ask why he is doing it now--and tell him don't call you that anymore if he loves you and respects you---

 

[coscar]

My Brother was exactly like your brother sounds. He gave me my first black eye, he also gave me my first nose bleed, he would wear my nice clothes then dump them under his bed so that I couldn't find them, he would do any thing to annoy me till I learnt not to show him my annoyance. He was the main reason I left home at 16.(To get away from him!) I'm now 71, he's 73, and the only word we have spoken to each other since then is "Hello" ( Only when we're at a family function.) and I can honestly say that it's great not having him in my life.

 

[Stonecold]

coscar I agree with you totally, I had some in my family that were Southern Baptist and would always say we love you but we wish you weren't that way and to me that is as bad as calling me the F word. It took me a few years of trying to please them before I realized fuck them and there Baptist preacher. I only have one regret and that is I didn't write them off much sooner in my life. We have not spoken in over 30 years and I can honestly say it's great not having them in my life also. I have friends that are every bit as close as any brother or sisters can be. Turn away from him.