My initial viewing of it (the video) was… well, it was OK. I could easily see where the Catholic church would get involved (it’s not like they have much better things to do nowadays, because the views of a pop star are so important…), but there was something else; something that stuck with me. I didn’t know what it was, but I knew I had to see it again to really understand it.
But before I did, I did something I never truly realized I hadn’t done: I read the lyrics.
As I scanned them down and took them, I realized that once again, GaGa was conveying some kind of message within the heretics of it all. And somewhere within it, I got it.
I really got it. And then, something weird happened.
I had to hear the song. This wasn’t one of those, “Oh, I really feel like hearing this jam right now” moments. It was a very rare, “There is something meaningful within this that I need to pay attention to.”
I immediately re-added it to my iPod… and then, watched the video again.
And as it ended… I had tears in my eyes.
I, too, had loved Judas, baby. Many times.. and that line, “Jesus is my virtue, but Judas is the demon I cling to” has been something I have experienced more times often than not.
If there is one consistent point in everything GaGa does, it’s love. Love of yourself, love of your fellow man, love of men who love men… it’s always the biggest thing in her world; what she believes in beyond everything else… where the deepest of her faith lies, so it makes sense to intercept the two in this very holy light.
Judas isn’t a person, per se… he’s love at the worst point; everything love truly is not. Everything bad you hear about it; the obsessive nature, the parts that make you crazy, the points that keep you holding on even when everything around you is telling you to let go… and you still don’t. That is what Judas is.
Jesus, in this sense; is the purity of love. The factors we should hold: the beauty of it, the nature of feeling safety, knowing that everything is right: the truest points of love.
“Jesus is my virtue and Judas is the demon I cling to.”
Pure love is what I search for… but bad love is what I constantly find myself attracted to.