What do you think about gay couples adopting children?

[SimplyJakeAndAlex]

I think it funny that the male-female parenting thing comes as the best model at the hands of all others. Maybe it's just because we live in a heterosexual normed world. Maybe it's because raising a fully functioning heterosexual child is a sign of success that makes it so. If a child turns out to be gay it is a sign that parenting was likely at fault. When it's a heterosexual set of parents who've raised a gay child it's the fact that the father didn't spend enough time with the boy, or the mother smothered him. If a gay male couple have raised a gay boy it's the fact that he's been normalized to homosexualty and would thus follow. When a gay boy results from a lesbian couple it's because he didn't have "enough of a male influence." To say that heterosexual couples are best is the feed into the idea that creating a heterosexual child is the goal and anything less has been a mistake. A girl who is a tom boy, or an effeminate boy line up as against the norm and are a result of bad parenting. It's not true and I refuse to believe that gays are any less capable parents.

Alright I personally find those statements a little out of context... I understand the needs of gay couples to be treated equally in society, because I am made of the same leather... but trying to minuend the natural way of how things should be it's a little farfetched. Although my dude can sometime be mislead for a girl due to his girlish appearance (he's so fucking cute ), this doesn't change that he has an Adam's apple, a prostate and the reproductive genitalia of a man... It doesn't matter the amount of sperm I'll shoot in his beautiful ass, he still won't be able to conceive a child I don't expect him to bear children and neither does he expect me. So YES the male-female couple are the best model and there's NO DENYING IT can't change million of years of evolution to come up and throw away what is natural. Not to disagree totally with what you said, because a kid can be raised by two men or two woman and they will be perfectly fine, and yes perfectly fine means (Interested into a natural sexual behavior which is man/woman). As I said above I have two children, and I am not going to tell my son that because his dad has a boyfriend, that I want him to have a boyfriend (in fact I hope with all my heart that he won't be gay) but if that's what he likes he knows that he will be fully supported. My daughter has a boyfriend and never was once interested in a girl... and to me I am just happy with that. The only influence we put as gay parents, is the openness of their minds about different natural sexual behaviors, what they will turn out to be is their own choice, but at least they know they can come to me and Alex and discuss it openly.

So here's something a little bit more accurate... yes heterosexual parents do expect their son or daughter to be heterosexual (I find that just normal, can you really blame them?), most gay parents do not expect their children to become gay because they know the great deal they had to accept their own sexuality and they surely don't want their sons or daughters to go through that. As a dad I really really hope they would not and Alex and I are not raising my little dude to become gay, he's 10 years old and unless he really have the feeling that he might be gay we are going to help him go through it and accept is desires with the same value of a hetero kid.

If I have my son having a bath with a little cousin of his and he decide to play kiss kiss penis on the other boy, neither I or Alex will go "awwww that's so cute" because we are gay, hell no, we'll do just like normal parents would and we'll intervene and perhaps give punishment as this is not allowed for a 10 years old in my mind to do such thing...

So please don't mix the concept here, parents raise their children according to the values they receive or learned themselves, not according to pejorative preconceptions of gay raise gays, and hetero raise hetero. :cheers:

 

[Tom]

I see no problem, especially when you consider all the divorced couples now trying to raise children on there own.

 

[carsonjl]

All for it. Everyone needs love and support.

 

[perrymason12]

Love is love and it allows everyone to thrive. Children don't recognize the importance of gender until they are old enough for society to influence their world.

 

[SimplyJakeAndAlex]

Children don't recognize the importance of gender until they are old enough for society to influence their world.

Actually they do... very extensive researches have been done (Berkley U, Yale U, Mc Gill U, and few other universities) in order to find out if a toddler (female per se) could make the difference between another toddler being a male or a female... of course they're not influential... but at a very young age human beings do make the difference in gender (obviously in all innocence that is)

 

[gb2000ie]

Actually they do... very extensive researches have been done (Berkley U, Yale U, Mc Gill U, and few other universities) in order to find out if a toddler (female per se) could make the difference between another toddler being a male or a female... of course they're not influential... but at a very young age human beings do make the difference in gender (obviously in all innocence that is)

If you think about how we lived before technology, this makes a lot of sense - only females have tits, so only females can feed the baby - straight away, from birth, kids experience a difference.

B.

 

[SimplyJakeAndAlex]

If you think about how we lived before technology, this makes a lot of sense - only females have tits, so only females can feed the baby - straight away, from birth, kids experience a difference.

B.

Totally agree... I remember my own children when they were little... how often did I rock my daughter on that chair that I still have and refused to get rid off... she was 1 years old and she would easily make the gender difference when mommy was rocking her she would cry her head out... but if daddy was rocking her even if I was not singing she would know it was me. Scientist have studied the brain of young child but not babies as it is not yet permitted. But although at a young age we seems very fragile and innocent, the human brains develops very quick when it feels danger... remove the parent of a baby they will be able to survive surprisingly for few days... try that once... take a baby and present a male peck to suck most definitely he will reject it and bring him to a breast he will accept it... cognitive sense are very develop on a baby. And as older we grow up, we loose that cognitive natural sense as reason take the place of instinct. And obviously few other things comes in play to blur one's mind... religion for instance LOL

 

[fredinch]

Go for it! Lots of couple, and single, friends have done it and couldn't be happier. Not for me though.

 

[bigsal]

On this argument there are too many platitudes and false positions. Children should be given for adoption to those who have the care, attention, but most of all love, regardless of straight or gay couples.
But unfortunately (for children) in real life is not so.

 

[Manta1983]

IMO, anyone -- straight, gay -- who wants to either have or adopt children needs a license and thorough testing to get it. I say this because there are so many children who are abused, neglected or killed by their own parents who obviously should not have had them.

 

[gb2000ie]

IMO, anyone -- straight, gay -- who wants to either have or adopt children needs a license and thorough testing to get it. I say this because there are so many children who are abused, neglected or killed by their own parents who obviously should not have had them.

So you're in favour of a license to fornicate? Or are you just suggesting this for adoptions?

In the case of the former - that's the kind of government intervention that anyone less authoritarian than a dictator would baulk at!

In the case of the second option, is that not what we have now? Everyone who wants to adopt, of any gender, goes through a lot of tests. I know this from direct experience in my close family.

B.