Gaydar??

[theseeker]

Sorry dargelos, guess I was a little irked by that statement. And yeah, often those insecure guys will try to justify their fears with things like religion ("IT'S A SIN!"), how unnatural it is (like flying at 30,000 feet in a giant metal tube at 500mph is at all natural either), or how it destroys the family unit/structure ("THINK OF THE CHILDREN!").

 

[topdog]

.... So how many of these men were gay? Not one. This was in a rough tough ex mining village. Gay men don't stay in backward hicksville places like that when the gay bars of Newcastle are not far away. Why do they adopt gay music and gay looks? Thats another topic, for now the point is that all those obvious clues turned out to be completely misleading...

Sounds like some clubs in New Jersey.

For me, "Gaydar" consists of:

• Culture - Yeah - hair, clothes, language, movement - this is the easy stuff... and the easiest way to be misled by the aspiring metrosexual. If this is the only tool you have, you are better off retiring your limited gaydar before you either look like a fool or get punched in the nose.
• The Hunt - As Dargelos and others have said, men are men, and when they see a sexual target it (literally) hits a nerve in the brain and usually shows in the eyes. A hetro is going to turn his head when a pretty girl in a tank top walks by; ditto for the homo when the cute twink or beefy stud brushes by in the shopping mall. If your suspect is actively cruising then he will want to get your attention. But even if he's not you can learn to read the light in his eyes before he looks away.
• The Closet - The heavily closeted guy will be actively trying to shut down outward signals. However, what he usually fails to do is to replace the "missing" gay tics with straight cues. So you are looking for what is not there. This is kind of like the way astronomers predict where they will find a star or planet by noticing odd way other celestial objects are moving around the unseen object. Putting this to work takes some more advanced empathy and observation skills. It also requires observing the "suspect" for at lest a few minutes of social interaction. But if you know what to look for, you can detect that someone has edited all traces of sexuality completely out of their social personality.

 

[dargelos]

Now that really is advanced gaydar skill, detecting the closet case the way AWACS detects radar jamming from the things it cant see as well as the things it can see.
Impressive technique. We can all learn from that.

 

[tonka]

The metrosexual strait guy has really thrown a wrench into gaydar.
There was a time when it really didn't exist. Strait guys just didn't act that way.

I think it was the mainstreaming of gay culture that taught strait boys how to up their game. Clothes that fit, accessories, better haircuts, mangrooming, gymfit bodies.
The boys look a LOT better, and I'm taking credit for it.
You're welcome.

 

[norvehc]

I think gaydar exists, and I think it's more accurate than most people realise. However even if your gaydar tells you some one is gay, it doesn't necessarily mean that anything will happen between you and him. The timing might be wrong for the other guy, or you may not be his type and so often nothing at all may happen. He may just chose to pass up the opportunity to take it any further. Keep practicing using your own gaydar. Practice makes perfect, and its a very useful skill to have!