Yes or no. No can do.
I was raised a Catholic too. Boston Irish Catholic family.
As a boy, I wanted to be a priest (mid 1950s). I don't think it was a calling. The priests were respected, and gay. I think that's what attracted me.
But as I became a teenager, I became a sceptic. Mom woke me up one Sunday morning so I wouldn't be late for church.
I replied that church wasn't for me. Too her credit, she accepted my answer.
I now go to Catholic services for family occasions. Marriages, deaths, baptisms.
The ritual is comforting, and bonds me to my family.
But do I believe? I do not.