When and how was your "Coming Out"?

[KoenDB]

The first person who knew was a friend of mine. She said: "Ok, I hope you can stay calm after I said this, but I'm bisexual". I just replied: "Me too."

Other friends took longer, every now and then I told it when it was relevant - to girlfriend for instance - to or when the topic allowed it. But I didn't came out to everybody untill I met my current boyfriend at the age of 22.

I still don't really consider myself to be gay or bi, I am just attracted to nice people with character.

 

[Sinnerr]

Article what could be useful for some:
http://www.nullrefer.com/?http://ww...ming-out_b_2104164.html?utm_hp_ref=gay-voices

 

[adl]

when i was 18, i just told them, i was tired of hiding things

 

[noone88]

blah, I wish I was in these forums when (or before) I came out... Well I just had a bad day and drank "few" beers alone at home, then I decided to send a text message to my friend and told that I was gay . Fun. But few months after that I decided to tell it to my two best friends who accepted it and after that I told it to pretty much all of my friends. All went smoothly, I still haven't told my family though and I don't intend to either before I move out from my mom's place.

Hah, found this post in here by me from 3 years ago, the precise date is 29.12.2009... Just a bit of an update, I still haven't told my mom but I'm moving away in few months so I guess that's the time then. I also posted somewhere that I hadn't come out to my friends in my school (3 years ago). Well, now everyone in my group knows that I'm gay and have known for 2+ years. Everyone's fine with it, and I'm graduating in one month and already got a job from the place where I wanted. To sum it up, everything went better than I expected.

 

[patrickbsf]

I came out after several years of "talking around it" with my parents. I just wasn't very good at hiding it. But I didn't want to just admit it to them. I was in my 2nd or 3rd year of college (in 1984!!) and so they didn't have a lot of power over me.
Oh wait... I lived with them at the time and they "asked me to leave..." So I moved out the following Winter. Wat was strange was that my mom, who passed in 1994, insisted that we always say that I was "asked to leave" and not "kicked out."
She didn't like the implications of kicking out her kid -- even if I was 20 at the time... None of my older bros or sis were "asked to leave." and they drank at least as much as I did... I did smoke weed more openly than they did... lol
I guess, for 1984, it was sort of ahead of its time. My parents are both deceased now (dad in 2000). We came to peace with each other before they both passed. It kills me that it's still such a big deal to come out in America. People can say it's not -- that it's blase -- but I don't think it is. I think kids still take huge risks when they tell their parents they're queer.

 

[onkelholle]

mother asked and I said yes.....done....

 

[Sinnerr]

mother asked and I said yes.....done....

The best Mom, or not?

 

[herod]

Just came out to my roommate, who was super cool with it. Nothing has changed between us. He said he wouldn't mind me being gay and he stuck with his words

I love him so much :heart:

 

[kiriel]

I came out to my family three time . when I was 18, then again when I was 21 and the last time was when i was 23. But all attempts to come out failed )=

My family, especially mom and dad, chose to be ignorant of the fact that I am gay. And they just dismissively told me that I am just passing a phase and I will have to get married with a girl and give them grandchildren like a normal straight guy.

But I am not normal, I am proud to be gay and special! It's just that lately I am under a lot of pressure from my family to settle down. As I am the third eldest amongst all my cousins, and my eldest and second eldest cousins has gotten married )=

Wish me luck on my 4th Time Coming Out guys! This time I will bring my boyfriend in for support.

 

[Sinnerr]

I came out to my family three time . when I was 18, then again when I was 21 and the last time was when i was 23. But all attempts to come out failed )=

My family, especially mom and dad, chose to be ignorant of the fact that I am gay. And they just dismissively told me that I am just passing a phase and I will have to get married with a girl and give them grandchildren like a normal straight guy.

But I am not normal, I am proud to be gay and special! It's just that lately I am under a lot of pressure from my family to settle down. As I am the third eldest amongst all my cousins, and my eldest and second eldest cousins has gotten married )=

Wish me luck on my 4th Time Coming Out guys! This time I will bring my boyfriend in for support.

im not sure if its good idea. but if so - good luck. and thx 4 sharing

 

[HotDougBunz]

I came out to my family three time . when I was 18, then again when I was 21 and the last time was when i was 23. But all attempts to come out failed )=

My family, especially mom and dad, chose to be ignorant of the fact that I am gay. And they just dismissively told me that I am just passing a phase and I will have to get married with a girl and give them grandchildren like a normal straight guy.

But I am not normal, I am proud to be gay and special! It's just that lately I am under a lot of pressure from my family to settle down. As I am the third eldest amongst all my cousins, and my eldest and second eldest cousins has gotten married )=

Wish me luck on my 4th Time Coming Out guys! This time I will bring my boyfriend in for support.

First of all, you are NORMAL! Never question that. You can try any approach you choose but you may or may not have a resolve with your parents. At some point, you will just accept what ever you have with them. If they never acknowledge this about you, move on! You're an individual and it is important only that YOU accept who you are. No one else matters if you are not happy with you! Find your happiness. Sounds like you have a BF standing with you. Embrace that support because it is real and about you and those who stand with you!

Be well and at peace. You are whom you are, not what anyone else would like you to be.

 

[jamiejon]

I have never been "in"

 

[Sinnerr]

I have never been "in"

Does it means you've just told "I'm into boys" immediately when you thought it for first time? Or you took title of this thread too literally?

I'm saying again. Please, be more communicative in this thread.

 

[jkrog]

My coming out seems to have been quite hassle-free. my parents except my husband and i take him to work functions etc.

 

[mattsmith]

I've got two older brothers who I adore. Both are rather muscular, athletic "men's men." They always claimed to be straight and into girls, but I found out several years ago (when I was about 13) that during dry spells, they'd watch porn and help each other out. I wouldn't have guessed. But that was the firs time I did anything with a guy was when they thought I was old enough to join them.
I've only ever seen them bring girls home, and I've heard them enjoying their women LOL. So like I said, they're fairly straight.

That said, I had a crush on my oldest brother fairly early on. And he became one of my closest confidants. I told him first that I liked guys. He was totally cool with it. He actually prepped my parents before I told them. They weren't quite sure how to feel at first, but they've since accepted me as if it's nothing.

I do live in a rather conservative area. I'm not exactly "out" to the community, but I also don't lie about it. Basically, I don't really bring it up, and many others don't either. I'm not very effeminate, so I don't know how many people suspect. If asked, I'd easily say I was gay, but I don't advertise it.

My oldest brother and I still hang out, and I know if anything were to happen (someone threaten me or something), he'd totally have my back.

 

[Minkepuss]

The eighties were a strange time in the UK to be gay, the Thatcher government was pushing through legislation to stop the "promotion" of homosexuality in schools (!), not many celebs had come out, our role models were Jimmy Somerville, Boy George and Sir Ian McKellern. The threat of AIDS loomed large over the country with dark adverts encouraging people to stay safe, and in my world the only people my parents thought of as gay were John Inman, Larry Grayson, Quentin Crisp and the Russian agent Tim Philby. I told my close girlfriends one night in 1986 in a straight bar, and they were great about it. Soon I was emboldened to tell my parents. Mum was aghast and Dad was great about it. Dad had lived through the brutality of the Nazis in Germany and was opposed to discrimination in any form, whether it be religious, colour based, political, or sexual orientation. He witnessed the extremes of hate and prejudice, ignorance and propaganda and was very philosophical about my sexuality.
They met my partner of 21 years in 1991, and have been cool ever since, they just see him as another son -in-law.

 

[DaveH]

I watched Lilies (a film) with my mom one summer home from university to kick-start the conversation.

 

[johncruz]

just a newbie here... and dunno hoe it goes... .rofl.

 

[ERICOOL85]

not out yet an feeling lonely :/

 

[ihno]

Well, why not coming out tomorrow?