Penpals?

[bigsal]

I can`t dispose of thoughts connected with punish after death.

Dear deef,

do not worry, no one will punish you after death.

We are already paying enough with this life. Live peacefully, you'll see that you will think less of death

 

[Rebel7]

I admiring your attitude (similarly Jack`s and Tonka attitudes) ,but I`m strange person. I`m mentally really weak. But maybe with time I will achieve a much strong? and I will be strong enough to move from here. I hope so. I can`t dispose of thoughts connected with punish after death. Oh my. I`m so abnormal. :worried:

I too was at that point where i had to question religion, punishment and all. Myself being baptize Roman Catholic grew up attending a Catholic school. I was glad prayer time were short but had to deal with catechism...so me too had to rid of these thoughts about the doctrine. At your age, that is 19, i had a gf who was into Buddhism. I read quite some stuffs she had which were quite marveling and mind opener for me. My point is having constantly to thinking about religious doctrine wouldn't help you get rid of it. It's vain to believe in a book and live your life according to what was wrote, misinterpreted, mistranslated, tampered with for 2000 years or so. You're not mentally weak, you were rendered so by the doctrine. Believe in you, you're stronger and your fear about punishment will lose its grip from your mind. Don't give the doctrine that much attention and importance, free yourself from it and live your life according to your principles.

You know guys, I decided that I will be alone/(virgin? :blushing: ) till my death. Will be better for me and for others. Definitely.

And you know what, i'm sure you will review this decision in maybe a few years time

 

[deef]

Dear deef,

do not worry, no one will punish you after death.

We are already paying enough with this life. Live peacefully, you'll see that you will think less of death

What if He punishing me now? My life is like hell for me.
My teacher of religion told in the class that every single gay people is like a devil who lives on earth. The gay people will be damned :worried:

I too was at that point where i had to question religion, punishment and all. Myself being baptize Roman Catholic grew up attending a Catholic school. I was glad prayer time were short but had to deal with catechism...so me too had to rid of these thoughts about the doctrine. At your age, that is 19, i had a gf who was into Buddhism. I read quite some stuffs she had which were quite marveling and mind opener for me. My point is having constantly to thinking about religious doctrine wouldn't help you get rid of it. It's vain to believe in a book and live your life according to what was wrote, misinterpreted, mistranslated, tampered with for 2000 years or so. You're not mentally weak, you were rendered so by the doctrine. Believe in you, you're stronger and your fear about punishment will lose its grip from your mind. Don't give the doctrine that much attention and importance, free yourself from it and live your life according to your principles.

Thank you. But... what can I say, I think that can`t change myself...


And you know what, i'm sure you will review this decision in maybe a few years time

I`m pretty sure that my decision will not be changed Physical love is not for me. I`m only esthete



Thanks guys that I can talk about my problems, but please don`t laugh of me.

 

[tonka]

You are our new friend, and we are not laughing at you. Maybe we see a little of ourselves back when we were 19. Me at 19....that was funny.

You do have some good things in your life. You study at a university. Your parents support you. If you learn and get a good degree, maybe you can support yourself. That will give you much more control over your life.

And Poland is in the E U? There are many wonderful places in the E U where gay people are just part of the mix. You and Teddy could move to Spain. I'll bet Teddy thinks the Spanish boys are cute!

 

[Sinnerr]

I think no one here is laughting at you. We are with you.

Your teacher of religion is just liar! All people are various. Someone is good someone is bad. Or better say everyone is sometimes good and sometimes bad. No one is devil no one is angel. I know one proverb which really fits on most of these preachers: "Under the candle is biggiest darkness." Gay people are same bad or same good as straight people are. Being good or bad is about character. Being intrested to same or opposite sex is about sexual orintation. There is no connection between these two things.

As I wrote on previous page. Homosexual behavior exist not only between people. So why humans should be exception? It's absolutely unlogical! There are many theories why some people are interested about same sex. For example that homosexual people are breeding by women which are geneticaly prepared to breed many childern. Or that homosexuals are often younger than their siblings (that after every childbirth mother's body mekes hormonal changes which increase probability that next one child will be homosexual). I'm not scientist so i can't rate it seriosly.
If you look on another things what church preach for example their issues about masturbation. They told (and in Poland maybe still are telling) that it's unhealthy, that it causes spleen, getting older visually, destroing genitals, destroing bloodstream. But reality is absoletely inverse in all these things. It's very good for circuling of blood, within orgasm veins getting endorphins - hormons of happiness, genitals which are in flow are healthier and more powerful. Just erotical or autoerotical activities is need for every adult (Except asexual poeple. But asexuality is not decision. It's nature for few people. So celibate of priests, munichs is not asexuality.- And also it's failuring often). Straight people also having sex oftely that the are breeding new generations (I believe in Poland it's secret).
So homosexuality as I understand it is just natural contraception. Mother nature is so intelligent that she gived for people sexual needs which are oportunity for deepest feeligs and emotions too. And she also knows that we pepople need more endorhines in our veins than childern in our houses and apartments so she make some people gay(Can you imagine that everyone would be straight and from every loving act would greed child?). Well, she probably doesn't calculate with cotraception pills and condoms but no one is perfect. .

Deef, no one here wants to force you to any sexual activities. if you would be really asexual in your nature this would be no problem. Same as someone wants sex 3 times a day which is normal. Someone wants no sex which is also normal. Fucking is not prohibited but also not required.
Many gays on comming out has disgust for imagine sex with another man. I was the same. I heard thousand times that it's ungly, unnatural, that asshole is not for fucking, that gays are sex obsessed strangers for whom aren't girls enought.
Now 3 years later I know that gays are just guys who are interested about guys. That's definition. Nothing less nothing more. Except this they are quite same as straight people. Fat or slim, tall or small, young or old, talkactive or quiet, confident or shy etc...
I know I'm gay. I like all the people. I got also lot of female friends but the nearest one beside me has to be male. Also what I do with my ass is no one's other bussines. I keep trying to be good. And it does not interfere with my sexual orientation not even my sexual activities. I would even say I couldn't be good to people around me when I wouldn't be fair to myself.

I've read what you wrote It seems to me You're in doubt and don't want to do. Don't surrender. Althought your country is not friendly to you. Here are many gayfriendly placesd in Europe. It's good You've mentioned this possibility. Be sure that many possibilities is in front of you my friend! Summer is just beggining. When school will be over (or maybe already is when you are in last year of highschool). You could make a trip somewhere in summer. Prague or Berlin are both gayfriendly cities not far from Poland...
Main thing what I would like to tell you is that you are not strage definitely! Your situation may be, your country may be! But you are not! Don't doubting about yourself!
Don't let priests or religion teachers force you to be sad and doubtful. They don't want to help you or guide you. They just want to own you! Don't let them do that.
I hope I'm not extremely imperative. I'm just trying outweight what you heard in school and church. So don't let anyone to force you anything. Do what you want and need. And don't forget you aren't strange. doesn't matter if anyone says it. Live your own. good luck!

 

[deef]

You are our new friend, and we are not laughing at you. Maybe we see a little of ourselves back when we were 19. Me at 19....that was funny.

You do have some good things in your life. You study at a university. Your parents support you. If you learn and get a good degree, maybe you can support yourself. That will give you much more control over your life.

And Poland is in the E U? There are many wonderful places in the E U where gay people are just part of the mix. You and Teddy could move to Spain. I'll bet Teddy thinks the Spanish boys are cute!

Thanks.
Yes Poland is in the EU, I mean that .. Teddy it my mascot! :blushing: He is not interested in people.
Oh my!, everbody`s know that Spanish people are pretty.
You know, I don`t have a money enough to travel. Anyway I`m kinda shy person so I need someone beside me.

I think no one here is laughting at you. We are with you.

Your teacher of religion is just liar!

Thank you guys. It really nice to hear from you.
I know! that she is liar but something inside me still obstructing me. I`m hypocrite, guess. I like gay people, but if that 'problem' involve me... I can`t reconcile it with myself.

Deef, no one here wants to force you to any sexual activities. if you would be really asexual in your nature this would be no problem. Same as someone wants sex 3 times a day which is normal. Someone wants no sex which is also normal. Fucking is not prohibited but also not required.
Many gays on comming out has disgust for imagine sex with another man. I was the same. I heard thousand times that it's ungly, unnatural, that asshole is not for fucking, that gays are sex obsessed strangers for whom aren't girls enought.
Now 3 years later I know that gays are just guys who are interested about guys. That's definition. Nothing less nothing more. Except this they are quite same as straight people. Fat or slim, tall or small, young or old, talkactive or quiet, confident or shy etc...
I know I'm gay. I like all the people. I got also lot of female friends but the nearest one beside me has to be male. Also what I do with my ass is no one's other bussines.

Hmm, I know Sinner but... I don't want to be alone in the future. And I think that I will not find a person who is not interested in physical love.
Ohohoh! I read yesterday story about guy who is gay and he came out to him parents. They threw him out without money ,without anything. He wrote that him friends took in for few months. He is complaining about work. He is still can`t finding some job for him.
That true story strengthen to don`t tell anyone who surround me. If I will be in that boy place, I don`t think that I will cope. I pretty sure that I will not.


People are cruel and hopeless. I don`t want to know how that boy could felt. What I`m saying! how he is feeling now.

I've read what you wrote It seems to me You're in doubt and don't want to do. Don't surrender. Althought your country is not friendly to you. Here are many gayfriendly placesd in Europe. It's good You've mentioned this possibility. Be sure that many possibilities is in front of you my friend! Summer is just beggining. When school will be over (or maybe already is when you are in last year of highschool). You could make a trip somewhere in summer. Prague or Berlin are both gayfriendly cities not far from Poland...
Main thing what I would like to tell you is that you are not strage definitely! Your situation may be, your country may be! But you are not! Don't doubting about yourself!
Don't let priests or religion teachers force you to be sad and doubtful. They don't want to help you or guide you. They just want to own you! Don't let them do that.
I hope I'm not extremely imperative. I'm just trying outweight what you heard in school and church. So don't let anyone to force you anything. Do what you want and need. And don't forget you aren't strange. doesn't matter if anyone says it. Live your own. good luck!

You know, I`m weird person not only for another sexual orietation.
I don`t wild about Germany , Prague is OK, but like I wrote above I don`t have a money enough and travel companion who I will really need, to travel. To be honest- my life totally sucks.

 

[Sinnerr]

First one reparation:
It seems to me You're in doubt and don't want to do. Don't surrender.
There should be "know" instead "want" and I probably should read my posts before sending.

I think I wrote everything what I could. All the advices was told. It's only up to you what you will do with your life.

But I don't understand one thing. If you are so asexual as you say How did you find this site full of porn?

I feel you are so pessimistic because of your enviroment. So trip somewhere out could make your mood better. Companion. http://nullrefer.com/?http://www.gayromeo.com/ Try to reach there I'm sure you're not only one gay in Poland.

Use the new anonymizing site, please

 

[deef]

But I don't understand one thing. If you are so asexual as you say How did you find this site full of porn?

:blushing:, I typed "gay forum" and I fond out this site. I thought that will be better if I write thread in foreign forum. I can be anonymous.

I feel you are so pessimistic because of your enviroment. So trip somewhere out could make your mood better. Companion. http://nullrefer.com/?http://www.gayromeo.com/ Try to reach there I'm sure you're not only one gay in Poland.

Ok, one time I tried know a gay-boy. But with time he would me to have physical love. (He told me that)

 

[Sinnerr]

Ok, it might be. It's long time when I've found this site, but I remember I wrote "gay porn". Mr. Google is mighty wizzard who is connecting various people.

As you said here you are annonymous. So, tell me about this boy who did you try know, please.

 

[deef]

Ok, it might be. It's long time when I've found this site, but I remember I wrote "gay porn". Mr. Google is mighty wizzard who is connecting various people.

oh! so you are here only for porn?

As you said here you are annonymous. So, tell me about this boy who did you try know, please.

Hmm, that guy. He wrote to me. To be honest I don`t remember from . Maybe from ones of a polish forums about music?. At first he was nice and polite. He was glad that he is gay, he was confident. I was surprised, because I always would meet a gay person. Unfortunately with time he changed and told some... some dirty things.

I have to ask you about something. I hope that it is not too personal. When time are you be one hundred percent sure that you are gay?

You know what? I have had enough of thinking about myself. I want to meet some friends. Actually I spending all day at home alone.
Why one time I feel that I`m bisex, one time gay and... (it is not joke) one time heterosexual, and one time asexual. So who am I?

 

[Sinnerr]

I'm not. If I would be here only because of porn I wouldn't chat with with you here. I spend about 90% of my time on this site here in this section. From two reasons I want to hold my solid level of English and sometimes are here discussing interesting things. I was searching porn and found conversation in English :rofl:

I guess you don't feel so bad when you're using this arrogant emotic icon in every your post.

When I found I'm gay on 100%? I would say I had it different than most of other gay guys or at least thes who I know. I was for long time waiting. Althought I live and always lived in quite liberal space I wasn't able to admit I could be intrested about boys. Probably I suspected it deep in my mind from I was 12 or 13 but I was refusing it. Althought I was still looking on boys everywhere I was thinkig: "Yes maybe I'm bi, but I want girl afterthat wife and finally family with childern. Only girl who would worth it haven't come yet." So I lived asexually till I was 18. These days my dreams and erotical fantasies from my "animal nature" caught me. One Sunday morning I layed in my bed and replaying these things from dream I've had in night. this day I first time admited that girls aren't for me(and I'm not for them). I thinked to me It's probaly time to throw conventions out I started imagining one of my classmates how I fuck him and jerked my dick. after getting of i thinked to myelf "It was cool ... But I'm fag ... Oh, shit ... I'm fag So what?!" Afterthat I downloaded some gay porn and jerked again "Just gay". So I knowed from this moment. I even started sometimes trying to making erotical offers for my female friends in pub, afterthat. It was only becase I was in closet and not prepared to shout my secret loud, yet. i did it intentionally cos wanted to be refused. Theater, fog cos I was scared that someone coul suspect it. And it was also 100% proof of my homsexuality. Girl was sitting on my knees I touched her breast and my dick was absolutely calm. So it was quite fast. I know boys who had "bi times" for 5 years and more. I mean They had relationships with both sexes within this time.

who you are? Lets play gay some gay porn - Does it turn you on? yes? so you aren't heterosexual. you are bi or gay. no? you might be heterosexual or asexual. next try lesbian porn does it turn you on? yes? you aren't gay you're bi or straight. If you will be turned on by both gay and lesbian porn you are bi. If you won't be turned on by gay neither lesbian porn you are asexual. if only gay porn picked up yor dick you are gay, if only lesbian porn picked your dick you are straight. It's simple. and result will be 100 %. Remember that being gay is absolutely ok!

 

[deef]

I'm not. If I would be here only because of porn I wouldn't chat with with you here. I spend about 90% of my time on this site here in this section. From two reasons I want to hold my solid level of English and sometimes are here discussing interesting things. I was searching porn and found conversation in English :rofl:

I guess you don't feel so bad when you're using this arrogant emotic icon in every your post.

I`m trying keep my sense of humour.

 

[Sinnerr]

It's cool, really.

So do you know who you are?

 

[deef]

Hmm still bi or gay.

 

[bigsal]

What if He punishing me now? My life is like hell for me.
My teacher of religion told in the class that every single gay people is like a devil who lives on earth. The gay people will be damned

Dear deef,

stop thinking about hell.

If this place really exists, the first would be to enter the priests, starting from your religion teacher.

Do not even worry about your sexuality. Over time, if you're quiet, you will find no problems.

You probably already know, but maybe themes to admit it.

Like I said, try to be patient, and takes flight as soon as an Occasion.

You already part of this forum, and believe me, is not few, is a great community of friends.

Is a good starting point.

 

[tonka]

I was 19 a LONG time ago. 1972. There was no gay culture (at least none that was obvious), and nobody was out. It was simply not talked about, and I pushed my feelings away because I had no idea how to make sense of them. I was crazy in love with my strait best friend, so I knew I was something.
I came home from school for the summer, and a good friend told me he was gay. He had a girlfriend, so I was shocked. But that was what helped me begin to accept myself.

And yes, your religion teacher is wrong. Your friends here are angels all. That's why they call it gay heaven. Except Jake. He's a bit of a devil. One of the photos he posted....I think I saw horns!

 

[SimplyJakeAndAlex]

I was 19 a LONG time ago. 1972. There was no gay culture (at least none that was obvious), and nobody was out. It was simply not talked about, and I pushed my feelings away because I had no idea how to make sense of them. I was crazy in love with my strait best friend, so I knew I was something.
I came home from school for the summer, and a good friend told me he was gay. He had a girlfriend, so I was shocked. But that was what helped me begin to accept myself.

And yes, your religion teacher is wrong. Your friends here are angels all. That's why they call it gay heaven. Except Jake. He's a bit of a devil. One of the photos he posted....I think I saw horns!

You saw well my friend for religious people I am the incarnated devil. I do have horns and Alex's favorite one is in my pants if he rubs it nicely he'll have magical mayonnaise and we use it to make his sandwiches :rofl::rofl::rofl:

 

[deef]

Hey guys,
Now I think that I don´t really care about it. Anyway.. I think that I´m ugly and too strange to make relationships.

So either way I will be alone Screw it! (I`m sorry for my words)
But will be better if I will be more confident. Ehh.

 

[tonka]

Yes, pretty and confident people have sex and relationships. But.....as I write this, millions of people are having sex right now!
They are fat and skinny and tall and short. Their tummys are too big and their asses too flat.
They have wrinkles and cellulite.

Most of us are not great beauties. We polish ourselves up as best we can. And to our surprise, someone likes us!!!

 

[SimplyJakeAndAlex]

Hey guys,
Now I think that I don´t really care about it. Anyway.. I think that I´m ugly and too strange to make relationships.

So either way I will be alone Screw it! (I`m sorry for my words)
But will be better if I will be more confident. Ehh.

Beauty isn't a guarantee that you'll have a relationship. My Alex is one of those hot looking guys and trust me he have been so used in its youth that he never believed he'd ever get a relationship. His first boyfriend used him so much, made him believe he was that special guy, while in fact the only things he wanted was sex and the social perks that Alex's brings with him because obviously when you're cute or beautiful you are surrounded by people (which out of 10 two will be your real friends). Most beautiful people feels as lonely as you are even though they are constantly surrounded.

I won't re-write here my first meeting with Alex but I can tell you that yes it was so sexual, but if you can pass over the physical you'll find sometime that as beautiful some are they are not always as confident as you would believe.